Dear Eleanora,
We've been through a lot this past year, mostly because a global pandemic unfolded before you had even gotten half way into being 6 years old. But despite that, and in some ways because of it, we had a lot of special moments. Our world now is different than we ever would have imagined it would be when you turned 7, but the chaos around us has made us closer as a family, and I feel this especially with you right now.
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Look how much you've grown!
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You and your BFF in the garden at school
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But I'll start back at the beginning of the year. You were in your Kindergarten year at TMHDS and you were absolutely thriving. You developed a sweet, special relationship with Ms. Reka, and you were both so fond of each other. You loved learning from her - anything she taught you - and you wanted to make her proud. You grew so confident while you were in her class for 3 years, and you still message with her now even though she's no longer your teacher. You did amazing in your class and met any challenge Ms. Reka gave you, including reading book after book, writing creatively, and doing multiplication and multi-digit addition and subtraction. You also made a close best friend, Laila, and you were two peas in a pod. You started Daisies with her and did fun activities and day camping (without me or Papa), and you had a lot of play dates with her. When she and her family moved away at the end of the year, we were all very sad, but you still talk with her sometimes. Last week you had a phone date with her after school, and you changed out of your uniform, re-did your hair, got my phone, went in your room and closed the door and talked for almost an hour, just like a little teenager. It was adorable! You also reconnected with another friend from your class who went to another school earlier this year. When Evie had her first sleepover in February, you were so jealous and visibly upset. I felt awful for you, but when you realized you could have a friend date, it made things better. I took you on a movie data with your friend Sophia, and you both walked around the mall holding hands and shared candy and talked nonstop. I was so happy for you to get to express that part of yourself.
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On your first movie date with your friend
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A lot of changes happened along with COVID, and you finished your school year virtually. You did an awesome job adapting to something completely different as we all tried to make sense of our new arrangements. You had new freedoms at home, since your class requirements were very little and Papa and I had to work from home, but this freedom was both a gift and a challenge. We tried to provide independence within structure, like with Montessori, but your natural desire for engagement left you frustrated, having people all around you but not being able to do anything with them (Evie's class was a lot more intense from home). But we all made it through, and we had lots of celebrations and fun and games, especially in the beginning. We went camping in the backyard on Friday nights for at least a couple months, and you especially loved having permission to have s'mores every time! We baked a lot and made pizzas, and you became quite the sous chef.
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Just cookin' away
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Your favorite part of camping!
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Your solo moment during the performance
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Having more freedom over the summer went better, since you and Evie both could do things together. Even though you chose to stop going to your dance class part way through the year, you made up for lost time by choreographing and performing with Evie. You made up several dances together, and you slowly went from keeping up with her to joining her in deciding what moves happened when and to which song, not to mention your growing passion for costume design and make up. For one week over the summer, Evie did a ballet intensive for her age range, and since you didn't have something to do, we found a dance school in New York to do remote classes through. You were amazing! You grew so much confidence in that one week - I was in awe watching you learn Fosse style, lyrical, hip hop, jazz, and musical theater, when you hadn't really done any of those before. When you get the chance to be on your own and be challenged, there's no telling what you'll do. You soon became the teacher and wanted to show Evie what you learned. In fact, for another two weeks, you and Evie both did the dance classes, and you continued to just blow us away. You’re now taking hip hop and jazz, and these outlets provide you with plenty of opportunity to showcase your sass and confidence. You’ve grown leaps and bounds in your dancing, but what Papa and I are even more taken by is your expressiveness and charm when you dance; you show a natural fierceness and joy for dance.
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| There wouldn't be the Sassy Sisters without you! |
You have learned to express yourself in many other creative ways too. Over the past year or so, you began creating stories and writing them down. You developed a whole book series called the Adventures of Jak and Teal. You learned to write on the computer because you were so eager to get it all written out. You also learned to play the ukulele this year. We tried it out over the summer, thinking we had more time to try things from home now, and you really took to it. Your ability to soak up and retain new knowledge is very impressive. You can play notes and chords now, and sometimes when you can't sleep or have some time in the afternoon, you'll pick your little rainbow ukulele up and just start practicing. You don't exactly sing along with it, but you do like to sing--mostly silly songs that you make up throughout the day. In addition to writing and music, you also just love creating with your hands. You love playing with play dough, and every once in a while I'll notice you've gotten very quiet, and I'll realize you've been intensely focused on making dozens of little play dough creations, many of which you gift to me and Papa. You also drift over to the art table to do some painting every once in a while, sometimes with a purpose in mind, and sometimes just to explore. You've even become adept at creating interesting spaces around the house, especially in the play room. We'll find the chairs rearranged and scarves and pillows strewn about in your efforts to make unique relaxation areas.
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| A focused writer
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The marks of a true artist
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Hey, there's a lovely space! (Believe it or not, she slept with these chairs like this one night).
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Just a girl and her uke.
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Your self-expression is becoming evident in other ways as well. You tend to show your feelings in extremes, which is lovely when you’re happy with someone, but when you’re not, you make it very clear. I think your feelings overwhelm you and you show, rather than tell, how you’re feeling. You are innately tuned in to what people might mean with their expressions or words, even if they’re not being clear about them, and it is easy for you to get angry if you think someone (like Evie) might be making fun of you or saying something condescending (which tends to happen with big sisters). I still may take the award for being able to make you the most upset, which I’m still trying to figure out. When I ask you to do something you don’t want to do, you give it everything you’ve got in showing me you don’t like that. I think your anger overwhelms you, and any words to tell me how you’re feeling are lost. You get physically mad (which I understand), and you’ve really worked to try to channel that anger away from other people. You often end up in your bed (by choice) feeling frustrated or upset, and I’ve learned to give you some space before trying to comfort you or talk with you. This morning, for example, you came in my room and laid on the bed while I was getting ready. I really like to have some time to myself while I’m getting ready for the day, so I became focused on that and missed the signs that you were looking for some affection. It would have been so easy, in hindsight, to lie next to you and snuggle for a minute before trying to have us both focus on getting ready for school and work. But things didn’t go that way and frustration got the better of both of us and ended up in hurt feelings all around. You teach me to pay attention to your needs, even if you can’t vocalize them very well.
On the other hand, you show the best affection any parent could ask for! You are a super snuggler, and I still pick you up or hold you in my lap just to give you big, long hugs throughout the day. You walk up to me randomly in passing and just wrap your arms around me and bury your sweet head in my belly. Sometimes we’ll just lie next to each other with no other goals than to ponder about the world, and you’ll hold my hand or rub my back or arm, or sometimes play with my hair. For your birthday you said you wanted me to sleep next to you, so I did, and I fell asleep so peacefully and easily. These moments are absolutely precious to me, and when I hold you or hug you, it is everything I need to be grounded and feel that all is right with the world. That’s saying a lot in a world like ours right now. You also extend these courtesies to your stuffed animals, which you’ve taken more of an interest in and become very devoted to since the pandemic. Whether its you’re giant unicorn, Uni, your ugly doll, Softie, your baby dolls Tenlyn, Glorie, and Peaches, or the numerous sparkly, winged, or horned stuffed animals you have, one or more can be found sitting with you during movies or sleeping with you at night. You recently received a new teddy bear from Tita Lee that you named Shelby, just like Grandpa. Need I say more about the sweetness?
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A special request of blueberry cobbler for your birthday.
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Our little wild one
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Your humor and charm continue to shine through your personality, and those of us who get to witness these traits on a regular basis are grateful for the lightness, fun, and laughter you bring to our family. I am so proud of the person you are, and I love getting to see you grow every day.
Love,
Mama
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