My Birth Story - Eleanora

The end of my pregnancy was becoming very taxing as I was getting ready to go into my 42nd week of pregnancy.  I knew this was a likely possibility based on my first pregnancy, which was just over 41 weeks, but I was naively hoping that this one would end sooner (and almost everyone told me that since I was a 2nd time mom, it almost certainly would).  But just like the last one, we had to do routine testing at 41 weeks called a non-stress test and biophysical profile to check on the baby and make sure she was handling the length of time well.  Last time, however, this was when we were told that my fluid levels were at zero (I think out of a score of 2).  So we had to stay to be induced, and from that point on, our birth plan kind of went out the window, and I ended up having many interventions that I did not want (i.e., pitocin, epidural, internal monitoring, artificial fluids).  These were most likely necessary, though, and even given all of those things I was still mostly happy with the whole experience.  However, I knew from the minute I had Evie that still I wanted to have the natural birth that we planned the next time I had a baby.  So when we went to our 41 week testing this time, I was very anxious.  We had been working with a doula group this time, and one of them said to make sure to drink plenty of fluids starting the week prior to the testing.  I had heard that this can influence your fluid levels in your placenta, but I wasn't really sure if that was true or not, but I did not want low fluids to be a reason that I was induced, so I drank as much water as I could. 

So Gabe and I dropped Evie off at school for the morning and went to our appointment at Tampa General Hospital with our hospital bags in tow just in case.  The biophysical profile was first, and it is basically just an ultrasound in which fluid levels, baby movements, heart rate, and a few other things are checked.  Thankfully, all of that was great for us, and she even said I had plenty of fluids (so the water thing may be valid!).  Next was more focused heartrate monitoring of both baby and I through the non-stress test, and again, it went very well and they didn't need to keep us on the monitors very long.  After all of that, a midwife from the group I'd been going to came to talk to us and do an internal exam with me.  She said I was at about 4 centimeters dilated (which was 1 more than the week before, and is usually considered active labor, although I wasn't having consistent active labor).  She asked if I wanted my membranes swept, and I said yes (even though it's awful and I hate it!).  Last time at this point that was what sent me into labor, and I wanted to do whatever possible to naturally induce labor so that I didn't have to worry about pitocin and all that comes with it.  So we left after that, planning to just wait as long as we needed to for Eleanora to be ready (we had 5 more days until we we would have to be induced).  Lee had picked Evie up from school and was watching her at our house, so we took advantage of the opportunity to go out to lunch together - something we haven't done for a very long time.  We went to a little Argentine restaurant that Gabe had seen before, and it turned out to be very good.  It's hard to think of Argentine cuisine without thinking of good wine, and they had plenty, so I asked Gabe to get a glass so I could have some (I'm still chicken about ordering wine while pregnant, even though I think it's okay to have a little here and there after the first trimester).  I drank most of the glass, partly because it was just really good, and partly because I've heard that it can relax the uterus and help start labor.

Nothing much happened for the rest of the day, although I felt a little crampiness here and there, but that is normal after an internal exam, and I'd been having that feeling on and off along with different kinds of inconsistent contractions and pressure for many weeks.  We went about the rest of our day as usual.  Gabe had planned to just work from home the rest of the week, which was nice because it helps a little bit with me watching Evie by myself which was becoming physically difficult at that point.  We put Evie down as usual, and I really wanted a mocha from Starbucks, so I asked Gabe to go get me one.  I really wanted to just walk around the house by myself in the dark for a while and focus my energy on relaxing and encouraging my labor to start, so I did that starting at about 7:45 and for the 30ish minutes Gabe was gone.  I felt like maybe I was getting mild, regular contractions about 10-12 minutes apart, but I was trying not to get to excited, as this has happened before a few times, only to fizzle out.  But it kept happening, and I was trying to also allow myself to get excited since I usually just try to stifle that feeling.  So when Gabe got home I casually mentioned that I may be having mild, regular contractions, but they were so far apart that I didn't know what to make of them.  Also, in the past if I changed activity (being active to resting, or vice versa), they would usually stop, but these pretty much remained through walking, resting, and a bath.  I texted my mom around 10pm just to let her know since she was planning to come from Orlando for the birth, but after that I decided to just try to sleep.  If they were real, they would not go away and they would wake me up from intensifying.  A few hours later, I realized they were getting stronger and a bit closer together, but I was still hesitant to believe it was real labor.  I let my mom know anyways, and she was convinced that it was my labor, so she said she would just go ahead and leave.  I'm glad she felt confident about it because after tracking a couple contractions that were about 8 minutes apart, they suddenly went to 4 minutes apart, and then between 2-3.  Most hospitals say to come in when they are about 5 minutes apart, but we seemed to have skipped that step!  I freaked out a little bit, but they were still pretty manageable, so I called our doula that was on call during the week, Jessica, to let her know, and she was very calm about it and said she'd come over to help me labor.  We also called Lee to come over since she would be watching Evie.  At one point I was nervous that we would need to leave before she got there, but our doula was very reassuring that we still had time.

The contractions stayed at about 3 minutes apart for a while, and I was finally able to practice some of the strategies I learned from my Bradley classes during my pregnancy with Evie and from the Hypnobirthing book I was reading for this one.  I felt most comfortable standing up and rocking side to side, so I did that while I closed my eyes and tried to make my body as limp and relaxed as possible.  I had read about many different kinds of visualizations to try to get into a more relaxed state, and for whatever reason I chose a rainbow one I had read about (which, at the time seemed silly and like it wouldn't be effective).  As your contraction intensifies, you start going through the darker colors of the rainbow in your mind, and as it peaks, you should be at red, and then you go back to the darker colors as it passes.  I was also trying hard to take slow, deep breaths through my belly (which is not our instinct), and I found this to be very helpful, and something I did not do well during my last labor.  I would breath in slowly and in my mind say, "purple, purple, purple, purple" for that whole breath in and out while I visualized the color purple, and do the same with each color.  I didn't always make it up to or past red, but that was good because that was the hardest part, and then if I had a longer contraction than normal, I still had plenty of colors to go through. 

Shortly after Jessica got to our house, she suggested laboring in the tub.  Gabe and I were unsure at that point if we should try to go to the hospital right away, but after talking to Jessica, we felt good about staying as long as possible at home.  I was still able to talk normally in between my contractions, and she was great at just having casual conversation and making me forget about thinking about them all the time.  So I went in the tub and just tried to keep relaxing even more, and occasionally we all talked in between contractions.  I knew I was managing them pretty well, but I was also getting to the point where I just wanted something new to happen and I didn't want to keep going through them, because they were painful and took work to get through.  I realized I was getting tired (I had only slept about an hour that night, and it wasn't particularly restful).  It was probably about 3am at this point.  Jessica suggested laying down to see if I could rest a little more before deciding what to do.  Although I didn't think it would feel as comfortable to lay down during the contractions, I was glad I did because I was tired.  She rubbed my lower back for a while and Gabe rubbed my feet a little, and we didn't really talk much this time.  As the contractions got stronger, I added to my visualization by imagining my older daughter painting the rainbow instead of me just imagining the colors.  It helped me to relax and feel good by imagining her smiling, proud face.  She doesn't know yet how much she helped me through my labor.  At a couple other points I imagined just holding my new baby and breastfeeding her - it's amazing how easily you can recall the peaceful, joyous feeling of breastfeeding (which I really enjoyed with Evie) and how much it can relax you.  Mostly, though I used the rainbow visualization, even up until my very last contraction.

After about 15 minutes of laying down, I think we all knew my labor was getting more intense and the contractions were getting closer together.  After a while of being able to rest pretty well in between them, I just felt like maybe we needed to think about going to the hospital.  I was getting a little shaky and nauseous at times, and Jessica said those were good signs of starting to transition (into the most intense stage of labor).  I was also dreading the 30 minute car ride and I knew that once we got there we'd have to wait a little, go to triage, get assessed and monitored, etc., so I wanted to get all of that over with while I was still able to manage my contractions so that I could get in a more relaxed state again.  So we decided to go.  I stood again for several more contractions, holding on to Gabe and swaying side to side while we got everything ready, and then we got into the car.

The car trip wasn't so bad.  I was mostly worried about having to sit the whole time and having to have contractions through bumps and turns on the road.  I had chosen some labor music a while ago and planned to listen to it on the way there.  There was one song, in particular, that I knew I would rely on, called "Sing, Oh Barren One" by Sweet Honey in the Rock.  I know, it's ironic because of the "barren" reference, but the song is so powerful and has lots of highs and lows and is about 11 minutes long, so I knew I would only need to hear it a few times before we got there.  I was going to use my headphones, but since it was faster to just plug it into the stereo, Gabe ended up listening with me the whole way.  I'm pretty sure I sang along at times, and almost cried a little sometimes (because I was wrapped up in emotion) but he was completely quiet the whole time, just letting me do my thing.  I had my eyes closed most of the time, but when I opened them, it was kind of nice to be riding through downtown Tampa at almost 4am; the streets were fairly quiet, yet I felt a unique energy and sense of clarity around me.

Upon our doula's suggestion, we pulled up to the Emergency Room entrance to valet our car (rather than walking about a mile from the self-park garage which we might have done otherwise!).  I remember stepping outside onto the curb and feeling a bit of coolness to the air - the first time I'd really felt that this fall.  I was standing and swaying through my contractions while holding onto a pole while Gabe got our bags out of the car.  A lady sitting in a wheelchair offered me her seat, as did the valet guy and the receptionists, but I really did not want to be sitting.  I felt much more in control standing.  We made our way through the hospital, and another family with a woman in labor was right behind us.  This woman was in a wheelchair and seemed to be suffering a bit more through contractions than I was, and I really wanted to say something inspiring on the elevator ride up, but I couldn't think of the right words, so I didn't.  On our way in I saw my mom and dad in the waiting room and hugged them.  I got emotional again, almost crying, because I was happy to see them, excited about what was coming for us all, and a little proud about how it was all happening.

We got admitted pretty quickly and went to a triage room so they could assess me.  This was the absolute worse part of the entire labor and delivery.  Our doula wasn't allowed in until we got an actual room, so it was just me and Gabe and a few nurses.  They wanted to have me lay down and strap monitors to me to check mine and baby's heart rates, but I really did not want to lay down, so I asked to stand, and they said I at least needed to sit (which nobody wants to do with a baby's head right between their legs, but for some reason I opted for that anyways).  My contractions were feeling worse, and the stress of the monitoring situation didn't help because the monitors kept slipping out of place and the nurses would try to reposition them and press on my belly to get the right placement, which was really disruptive and annoying, but I know they were just doing their jobs.  The nurse checked my cervix and said I was 5-6 cm dilated and 100% effaced.  I was pretty happy about that, and my goal was to be at least at a 5 by the time I got to the hospital, but I really hoped to be at about 7, because in my mind, that was when it would be too late to ask for an epidural.  Tammy, the midwife on duty, came in to check me as well and said I was 6 cm and very "stretchy."  While she was checking me, I felt a gush of warm liquid come out and told her I thought I was leaking.  She casually said I was, as my bag of waters had just ruptured.  She said there was light meconium in the fluid, meaning the baby had a bowel movement while in utero.  This can put them at risk for problems if they've gotten it into their lungs, but that's not always the case, and it was not surprising to see this since I was past my due date (the same thing happened with Evie).  So I was only a little worried about that, but I honestly felt like I couldn't spend that much energy thinking about it because I was so otherwise focused.

At any rate, the triage torture was not over, and they spent the next 30 minutes trying to get a hep-lock in me in case I needed to have any kind of fluids or medications (they have to at least do that much since I requested not to be fully hooked up to an IV).  This was awful!  I don't really have a problem with needles and I've watched people put large ones in my veins without flinching, but I guess my veins kept rolling and they couldn't find good ones, and although things became a bit of a blur, I think 3 or 4 different nurses were trying to do this.  They kept having to find someone else to help who was better at it.  They were also asking questions for admission, and I was ignoring them most of the time because I was just trying to get through my contractions and ignore the hep-lock problems.  Gabe realized he needed to answer for me, and that was helpful.  As I was sitting there just trying to hold it all together, one nurse realized I was totally dripping sweat and got a cold cloth for me.  That helped, but I wished they would have paid more attention to the rest of my physical state earlier because I was concentrating so hard on breathing through my contractions that I felt like I couldn't speak up for myself.

They eventually got everything they needed and had me walk to the delivery room because my baby was still in an ROT position and Tammy said she wanted me walking and upright so that she would be able to turn in the correct position for delivery.  I don't remember a whole lot about being in the delivery room because my contractions were so intense at that point and things were moving pretty quickly.  Plus, my eyes were closed most of the time because I had to close them to do my breathing and visualizations.  There were several people in the room - Gabe, our doula Jessica, my mom, the nurses, and eventually Tammy, the midwife.  I'm pretty sure I didn't talk to any of them the whole time I was laboring unless I absolutely had to.  I remember standing and swaying on Gabe through a couple of contractions, and at this point they were so strong that I was moaning through them (something I was previously told was good to do but thought I never would), and I remember from last time that this was the stage just before I lost control (although this time I was much further along).  I tried to keep my moan low and slow because I knew if I let it get higher and my breathing faster, my contractions would be overtaking me.

Almost ready to push.

One of the nurses was fumbling with the monitor again and trying to press on my belly to find the baby's heart rate.  She couldn't find it, so they had me lay down and flip to the other side, at which point I heard one of them point out that Eleanora was rearing her butt up on my left side really high.  This was good because it meant she had turned into the ideal position for delivery.  The nurse eventually found her heart beat down much lower than she was trying before because Eleanora had moved down a lot.  I stood up through a couple more contractions and I started feeling more and more pressure down low, and had to have a couple bowel movements (I won't discuss where or how that happened).  One of the nurses said that this meant baby was very close and she seemed to be nervous that I was going to have her on the floor (but I really didn't feel like it was that imminent).  She paged the midwife and checked my cervix again; I was dilated to 8-9 cm.  I went through a couple more contractions feeling even more pressure, and the nurse asked me if I felt like pushing.  I knew I was having a ton of pressure, but I wasn't sure if that was the same as feeling like pushing.  I vaguely remember Jessica saying to let my contractions do the work and move the baby down, and as much as I wanted to push to get the baby out so it could all be over with, I agreed in my distantly logical mind that I should wait a little bit.  The nurse checked me yet again and said I was complete (10 cm and completely thinned out), and then Tammy came in and checked me.  She said I had an anterior lip (meaning that just a part of the cervix had not yet gone away), so they needed me to change positions to a sort of upright hands and knees against the back of the hospital bed, holding on to it up top.  I knew from my last labor that this would intensify the contractions even more, so I was afraid to do it, but I was at a point where I was just in robot mode, so I did it.  I remember the contractions being unbearable at this point, and I remember just hoping for something outside of me to take over so I didn't have to feel the pain anymore.  I was trying my best to relax and breath through them and still use the rainbow visualization, but my moan was becoming a bit more of a cry for help and I was trembling when I tried to breathe.  I also was getting cramps in my hamstrings from that position and I couldn't relax my upper body, so I asked to get down and stand.  I swayed on Gabe a couple more times and said how much pressure I felt, so they said they would check me again to see if I was ready to push.

The position change must have resolved the anterior lip because they said to go ahead and try to push with my next contraction.  I still wasn't 100% positive that I was ready to push, but I knew I was ready to do something different and felt more and more pressure with each contraction, and I was all for getting the baby out.  So with the next contraction, I pulled my legs back and pushed.  It was really uncomfortable for just a moment, then I felt the urge to push completely take over (kind of like being in the middle of a big bowel movement, but much stronger).  I pushed long and hard and tried to listen to them when they told me to take a breath, because otherwise it was hard for me to stop pushing.  Everyone was telling me I was doing a good job, so I just accepted that.  I took a little break while my contraction passed, and then pushed again with the next one.  Again, it totally took over my body, and I started letting out loud squeals/yells without realizing it.  I've never heard myself make such sounds, but I guess I've never had a parallel opportunity.  I had a really big contraction that I pushed through and couldn't really let go of, but I could tell everyone thought I was pushing too long without a break, and I heard Jessica saying to let it go if the contraction was gone, but I really couldn't tell if it was gone or not. Then one of the nurses said that when I breathe the baby breathes, so I made myself take a breath.  Either during that or the next contraction, Jessica said to reach down and feel my baby's head!  I felt a warm, wet head of hair and it was just like what I felt with Evie's birth.  I remember the wave of emotion that swept over me in the same way, and I said, "my baby, my baby!"  It was good motivation to push the rest of the way, and so with the next contraction, I pushed again and felt the "ring of fire" everyone talks about when the head comes out.  It was an intense burning sensation, and I almost felt like I must surely be tearing from the inside out (but I wasn't).  Everyone around me was so excited and telling me what was happening, and I continued pushing until the shoulders and the rest of the body slipped out.

Eleanora's first breaths before I scooped her up!

I felt the most enormous sense of relief that it was over and I had my beautiful baby.  Tammy told me to take her and put her on my belly (although I was a little overly enthusiastic and tried to bring her all the way up to my chest, forgetting that the umbilical cord was still attached to the placenta, which was inside me).  I just held her and told her how much I loved her and listened to her perfect cry.  Gabe was ecstatic and almost giddy and my mom was so happy and glowing from the excitement.  It was one of the most wonderful moments of my life, and so similar to how I felt with Evie.

Of course, we were all elated.

The first time I held her (yep, that's meconium and other goo all over her body and I didn't care one bit!).

Eleanora feeling overwhelmed with the outside world.

Tammy asked if we wanted to wait for the cord to stop pulsing, and we did (last time they wouldn't allow us to because of the meconium, but I guess she felt that Eleanora wasn't showing any signs of distress from it, so she let us wait).  It was just a minute or two before it stopped pulsing, and then Gabe cut the cord.  A couple minutes later, Tammy asked me to give a small push to deliver the placenta.  Jessica reminded her that we were keeping it to have it encapsulated (thank goodness, because I forgot!), so they handed it over and we put it in our cooler.  I do wish that I had a chance to look at it more closely.  I forgot to do that with Evie's placenta as well, but I am very curious about exactly what it looked like and how big it was, etc.  But one of the women in the doula group we worked with was the one who did the encapsulation, and she also did "prints" on canvas which are made directly from the placenta and kind of end up looking like a tree of life.  So I'm very excited to see those. 

Eleanora weighed 8lbs and 3 oz, and was 21 inches long (just a tad bit bigger and longer than her sister).  She got a 9/10 on her APGAR score because she had very mild jaundice.  Everything else about her was perfect, and I began nursing her about 5 or 10 minutes after she was born, and she has done wonderfully every since!  I began nursing her about 5 or 10 minutes after she was born, and she has done wonderfully every since!

My dad came in around this time to meet Eleanora.  It was a much shorter wait than last time, so I was glad he didn't have to sleep in the car or waiting room overnight!  He was there while they gave her her first bath, and he later told me that it was the first time he'd been able to be there that soon after any of the grandchildren's births, so that was pretty neat.

After about an hour, we were taken to our postpartum room where we would be for the next 2 days.  We had to stay an extra day because of the meconium.  We weren't very excited about that, but we were happy to be in a much larger room than we had last time.  It was spacious and had a little couch for Gabe instead of a chair, and it overlooked the Bay, which was really nice.  A couple hours later, Lee came and brought Evie to meet her little sister.  We were so excited to see Evie and watch her reaction.  She was probably more excited to see Grandma and Grandpa, but she was also interested in meeting Eleanora - at least for a little bit.  We had talked about her for so many months; I'm not sure if what she saw was what she expected, but she's been pretty much how we expected - sweet, unsure, and a little jealous at times.

This is pretty much the end of the birth story.  As for parenting and daily life with a 2-year-old and a newborn, I'm sure there will be plenty more stories to share.