Three Months

Evelyn will be three months old on Sunday; part of me has been anticipating this milestone for a long time, and part of me can't believe how fast she's growing. I'm not sure exactly what I was waiting on, but I thought I had read several things about how eating and sleeping become a bit more stable around 3 months. Since she's never really had much of a pattern or schedule, it's a bit hard to tell if that is happening or not, although some things are changing.

She used to eat very frequently - like every two hours or more frequently during the day - and she's started spacing out her feedings more the last few days, at least during the day. She still eats frequently in the evenings, perhaps to load up before sleeping at night. Although she was sleeping 8-9 hours at once overnight for a week or two, that seems to have been a phase, and she's now waking only once overnight to eat, which I think is good and normal. Somehow I always worry about whether she's eating enough or not, even though she stays in the 70% weight range for her age. I love that I can feed her exactly what she needs and not have to worry about preparing anything or using products. That's not to say that breastfeeding is easy. While I haven't had many significant challenges, there have been bumps along the way and it's been difficult to figure out if I'm doing it "right" all the time. But at the end of the day (literally), she always seems well fed and tuckered out, so I'll take that as a good sign.

Sleeping. Ugh. Night time sleep has never been a problem (and I know we are so lucky for that!). Daytime sleeping, however, is very erratic. She would never be happy taking a nap in a crib, and I wanted to make sure she was getting enough sleep, so she's always slept either on someone, in her swing (evil, I know!), or in one of my wraps (this I don't feel bad about). Her naps were usually only about 20 minutes, with rare 2-hour appearances, but from what I've read, she should be sleeping more during the day. This week, so far at least, she has been napping much better. Not necessarily in better places, but longer and more frequently. I'm not sure if this will be the norm going forward, or if it's part of a growth spurt which should be happening around now. The next step will be getting her used to her (real) crib, which I've been slowly trying to do. One thing I have learned about my baby is that she does not take to new situations or people easily. And that's okay. (Perhaps she's cautious like her Mama and Papa?)

Crying. For some reason I thought I would be so good at taking care of her needs that she would hardly ever cry. I'm trying to accept that it's not always about what I do, but how she responds to certain things. I have yet to learn what her crying means each time, but I've gotten much better at it. The worst cry - where she holds her breath between wails and turns read and screams and grunts - is happening less and less, and I'm able to soothe her more easily when it does happen. I'm told it's because of gas that this happens, but I'm not completely convinced. I think it often has to do with her comfort level with new people or environments - and maybe gassiness added into the mix. I do wish that she was able to be comfortable with family members more easily, but she is her own person, and all I can do is try to make it as smooth for everyone as I can. I do know her tired cry now, and I can usually tell when she's missed a nap - that's no fun.

Content time. She has been having so much more lovely content time - this is probably my favorite change! The last few days, especially, she has been so content just riding in the car or playing and talking or just chillin'. I love watching her during this time - she curiously looks around and focuses on things and has some kind of casual conversation with herself that I adore listening to. I feel more comfortable going out with her now than I used to, although I still prepare myself for the worst.

Bottle. Bleh. We still try gently every day with the nanny, Debbie (although Lola has been here this week and Evie took some time getting used to her, so I didn't want to add this to the mix). Debbie thinks she made some progress last time she was here, and Gabe got her to take over 1 ounce, but mostly from biting the nipple. BUT - she wasn't upset. Our rule now is to stop as soon as she starts to get upset so that she doesn't learn to associate eating with something negative. Her pediatrician says that if it hasn't happened at this point, it probably won't. So I'm not sure if it's best to keep trying, or wait until she's ready to try a sippy cup (which could be just 1 month). Either way, she definitely needs to get breastmilk in some way while I'm gone, because even though I'll be with her all summer, I will start grad school in August, and I can't get out of that like I got out of going to work every day (to work from home). She'll be 6 months by then, so I really hope it all goes smoothly!

Smiles. Oh my goodness, she gives us so many precious smiles now! I think now she saves the best ones for Papa when he gets home from work or in the morning before he leaves. She laughs (or tries) and smiles over and over again for him. I get plenty during the day too, so I'm not jealous. She has started smiling when she's done nursing and talking a little bit, and it's so hilarious. Although I'm a little nervous that she's becoming a distractible nurser because she seems to end earlier and not as surely as she used to. But I'll give it a week or so and see how this changes - surely it will since very few things have remained stable since she's been born.

Growth. She's well into the 3-6 month clothing, and I can't imagine that she'll stay in them for the whole 3 months! There is a little room, but not a whole lot in most of her outfits. She's long though, and we use cloth diapers which are slightly bulky, so this probably adds to her filling out her clothes so well. I do feel more of a squishy belly on her - when I hold her against me to burp her there is definitely a little extra padding against me. She is also so strong - she loves pushing against things with her legs and trying to "stand" if you hold her up, and she has always been good about holding her head up. Gabe and I call her meerkat because she sits up really tall and looks around when you hold her sometimes, like a meerkat on the lookout. She still has a little ways to go with having total control over her head and ends up doing a little head banging here and there. She doesn't exactly love tummy time, but has gotten better about moving her legs in a crawling motion and trying to use her hands. Right now she arches up so high just using her back and neck muscles - if she only realized she could use her hands and arms to help! She is also grabbing things and holding light toys - that seemed to happen almost over night.

I'm sure we'll still have rough times, but I just love spending time with her (although a full 12-hours alone with her can be exhausting!), and I can't wait to spend more time bonding over the summer.